I don't know what it is, I don't know how to handle it. There are somethings about myself that I've recently learned and some other things that I have not yet discovered.
I haven't found myself, I don't know who I am. I'm not comfortable around myself. Sometimes I even feel trapped inside my own mind. It's really very weird. One would think that in 25 years, I'd be OK with who I am - well, not yet.
I've had my own place for four months now and yet I still haven't moved out - kinda like the guy in the movie "Failure to Launch". I know that if I am on my own, I will have to deal with and come to terms with myself.
At some other stage in my life, back when I was at tech, I was completely fine with my being. I was confident and people could tell. As I grew, I thought that so would my confidence - but it hasn't. As we age, some events occur that so brutally dent our confidence, build and restructure our character traits and change our personalities. These events either make us stronger or make us weaker - but whatever they do, they teach us a little more about ourselves.
I don't know what it is, I don't know how to handle it, but I feel that I haven't quite come to terms with who I am just yet...
7 comments:
I also feel the same way, 24 and nowhere near the point I thought I would be.
But to an extent my confidence did grow past those days, I take more chances now, but not before consulting with friends.
D, i think we all go thru that, this is the reason that Darren and i wanna go to Australia. We thinking that there has to be more to life.
I cant tell u how or when u will feel comfortable in ure skin again but when we were younger we didnt care much for people around us and hence we were happy in our skin and satisfied with life, but the Lord has ways of reminding us just how blessed and lucky we are. A collegue of mine reminded me of how blessed and happy i am in my life, i have a wonderful husband and a fantastic home life, great family and awesome friends, this collegue of mine was shot in the head and survived, he now has no hearing in his right ear and he cannot smell at all he also has only 80% of his taste - Hectic. As humans we r so selve indulged that we forget that we have a wonderful life compared to so many people and that our problems are nothing compared to others.
So be strong and spend time alone and try and find DELON again.
We still love D, we here for u!!!!
I get what your saying. Growing up we tend to believe that as we get older things are inevitably going to be easier, which is hardly ever the case. Hang in there friend.
sorry for my late response. I think that as people we are afraid of being alone or finding out who we are because we are secretely scared of what we might find, spiritually alot of people are who they are today based on what happened in their past (you might want to rewind your life to when you were a little boy and write down your growth process till 25).
When one tries to find themselves there is fear of "change" or "the unknown" but this shouldn't be the case when you discover yourself you'll be able to do what is right for you, we are sooo brainwashed to live our lives according to this world's unwritten laws (we all feel more comfortable when we do things that others approve of "the everyone lives this way syndrome".
I agree with Kerbear...Sit by yourself and just be still and see what happens (it will be scary) but your first step towards self discovery is to first conquer your fear of you.
No one can tell you who you are and no one else can ever fulfill you and satisfy your need for inner peace..... that can only ever come from within.
The Lord is here for you and wont place you in danger, good luck with your discovery.
Love you much.
Mum's
Sorry for my late response. As a society we have been brainwashed to follow the unwritten/unspoken laws of this world ( I call this living unconsciously) this does not mean you cant start living consciously (as you were meant to)….so to answer your question I’ll try and play shrink for a moment.
When people try to find out who they are they usually give up on the idea possibly because of fear of the unknown….when you discover yourself you put your self on the line to become vulnerable to who you really are (a very scary thought).
I agree with kerbear, I think you should take a day off (no work, no friends, no girlfriend, no family …nothing) just you surely 1 day out of 25 years to yourself is well disserved…be still and really listen to what Delon has to say to you. No one on this earth not your friends, not your family, not your girlfriend not even your work will ever satisfy your need for inner peace and real joy…that can only come from within.
We tend to want others to make us happy and therefore make other people the center of our happiness and lifestyle(we live our lives according to what will get buy in from others). The first step towards self discovery is to conquer the fear of you.
Do what is right for Dee and be content. Growing up is tough, growing up consciously is even tougher. The Lord is here for you….. I wish you wealth, health and inner peace.
Good luck and remember this should be about you (I hope this helps)
Here for you always.
Mums’
Most of my life I've been climbing anthills... made the same mistakes over and over.
As Waseem said, I think good guidance is essential and thats why we are all here to offer our experiences and advice to make it easier by clearing up the misconceptions of the vague times in our lives.
I had a really rough patch in my life, and thanks to good friends and family, i can feel confident that whatever they say is the best thing to do!
I know we all struggle with this. But
we are ever changing. Don't put yourself in a box and think you are a certain way...
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